Have you ever had a time where you knew God was teaching you something (or trying to anyway), and you just weren’t getting it? Then, one day, all of a sudden, everything makes sense…the light bulb comes on…you get it…really get it!
That’s where I’ve been the past month or so. It’s finally sinking in!
For the past 3-4 years, God has been asking me to surrender something to Him and I don’t know how many times I’ve ‘given’ it to Him, only to grab it back; afraid that He really will take it away.
But a few weeks ago, as I was praying and telling God that I wanted His will, not mine, to be done in this area; He asked me “do you really want my will, or do you just want me to bless your will?” *Light Bulb!* I began to realize, that was exactly what I wanted…I wanted my will with His blessing. Once God opened my eyes to that fact, I started sincerely praying, “Lord, not my will, but yours, be done! God, if this isn’t your will, take it away.”
It’s a scary thing, praying for God to take something away if it’s not His will for you…I mean, what if He actually decides to take it?! But I also felt God telling me, that, by not praying it, I wasn’t fully putting my trust in Him. So, I’ve been praying it.
Am I saying that I want Him to take it away? No. But I do want His will in my life, and if His will is to take it away, then, hard though it would be, I would let Him take it, and trust that He knows what He’s doing and continue to serve Him with my whole heart.